Quit annoying me
Dear college boys in the Navigator,
Please turn off your earth-splitting bass. Do you think you look cool? I see panties vibrating off of no one. My baby is asleep in the backseat, and you are rousing him with your gawd-awful noise. I would roll down my window and share my favorite expletives with you about your obvious lack of family jewels, but would you hear me? No.
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Dear creepy overeager male freshmen and fathers of,
Please quit approaching me and my baby, who are defenseless in front of our house, and ask me if it is okay for you to park along the street to give you more convenient access to the dorm for your moving in. Do I control this, a public street? Just because I am outside, and trying to ignore you, does that signal that you should approach me and ask for help strategizing on where you should park for the big move-in tonight? Do I know the difference between Gilbert "A" and Gilbert "D"? Do I care if you want to park here? Park where you want; it is a free country, after all. Just beware of the ticket on your window when you return because I (oops!) neglected to point out the sign, less than 10 feet away, that says "NO PARKING ANY TIME".
Love,
Claire
Please turn off your earth-splitting bass. Do you think you look cool? I see panties vibrating off of no one. My baby is asleep in the backseat, and you are rousing him with your gawd-awful noise. I would roll down my window and share my favorite expletives with you about your obvious lack of family jewels, but would you hear me? No.
------
Dear creepy overeager male freshmen and fathers of,
Please quit approaching me and my baby, who are defenseless in front of our house, and ask me if it is okay for you to park along the street to give you more convenient access to the dorm for your moving in. Do I control this, a public street? Just because I am outside, and trying to ignore you, does that signal that you should approach me and ask for help strategizing on where you should park for the big move-in tonight? Do I know the difference between Gilbert "A" and Gilbert "D"? Do I care if you want to park here? Park where you want; it is a free country, after all. Just beware of the ticket on your window when you return because I (oops!) neglected to point out the sign, less than 10 feet away, that says "NO PARKING ANY TIME".
Love,
Claire
posted by Claire at 8:44 AM
1 Comments:
You are too funny! I sure hope college town settles down after the big move-in!
The Target closest to my house is CRAZY right now...NUTSO... packed with the freshly-moved-in collegites buying up tacky lava lamps and other ugly crap for their dorms.
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