Worst sleeper EVER
I used to think, from reading the Flinger Files, that lil' LB Flinger was probably the worst sleeper ever. And then I remembered that, when Isaac was LB's age, he was a terrible sleeper. And look at him now ... all growed up at 19 months old. And STILL THE CRAPPIEST SLEEPER IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD.
The magic of the toddler bed still exists, though in a different and not-as-desirable form. Isaac dearly loves his bed, but he hasn't slept through the night in a week. It turns out that, like other sleep experiments we have tried, something "working" means he will sleep through the night for a few days, and then he is right back to square one. Two nights ago was the worst. He was up from 3 until 5 in the morning, not fussing, not asking for anything...just wide awake. He would get up from his bed and toddle around until I would catch him. All I had to do was tell him to get back in bed, and he would. I would cover him over with sheets, replace his doggy in an arm-crook, and Isaac would dutifully lay there, eyes wide open, until I left him to his own devices, at which point the entire process would repeat. Finally I refused to come back in his room, and, exhausted puppy that he was, he lay in his bed, screaming, for 15 minutes before he got up and walked to find me. When I pulled him into bed with Dada and I he slept until 9.
We tried cutting his naps back. He hasn't slept his usual luxurious 3-hour stints during the day since we got the bed. At first it appeared that rudely awakening him at the 1.5- or 2-hour mark was the key to a blissful night's sleep, but no more. Yesterday we even cut him down to a single painful hour (far too short for any sleep for his poor pregnant mommy), and he was up at midnight and 3 before getting up for good at 6.
In our cribby past, we have tried putting him to bed earlier, following the whole "sleep begets sleep" theory. Putting him to bed at 8 or 8:30 (instead of his accustomed 9 or 9:30) resulted in him getting up, for good, at 5 or 5:30 (instead of his accustomed 6 or 6:30).
In all our sleep deprivation and desperation, I have read I don't know how many books and listened to (and occasionally tried to implement) the advice of friends, relatives, or even strangers. When something works, it works for a couple of days and then we are back to night-waking. Something that continues to stick in my head, despite all the advice, are ringing voices of my mother and mother-in-law, who both attest that their sons (my brother and Dada, respectively) didn't sleep through the night until they were 2.
So I ask you...is this all just stupid? In all of our attempts to prolong Isaac's sleep, Am I trying to force an answer that will come about only when it is good and ready? As far as I can recall, the babies/toddlers I know that sleep through the night have either always done so all by themselves, or did so once their moms and dads turned off the baby monitors and quit interfering. Obviously ours has never done that. Should I keep up with our sleep experiments, which are quite frustrating in their inevitable defeat, or should I just try to relax and let Isaac sleep when he does and live with it when he doesn't?
The magic of the toddler bed still exists, though in a different and not-as-desirable form. Isaac dearly loves his bed, but he hasn't slept through the night in a week. It turns out that, like other sleep experiments we have tried, something "working" means he will sleep through the night for a few days, and then he is right back to square one. Two nights ago was the worst. He was up from 3 until 5 in the morning, not fussing, not asking for anything...just wide awake. He would get up from his bed and toddle around until I would catch him. All I had to do was tell him to get back in bed, and he would. I would cover him over with sheets, replace his doggy in an arm-crook, and Isaac would dutifully lay there, eyes wide open, until I left him to his own devices, at which point the entire process would repeat. Finally I refused to come back in his room, and, exhausted puppy that he was, he lay in his bed, screaming, for 15 minutes before he got up and walked to find me. When I pulled him into bed with Dada and I he slept until 9.
We tried cutting his naps back. He hasn't slept his usual luxurious 3-hour stints during the day since we got the bed. At first it appeared that rudely awakening him at the 1.5- or 2-hour mark was the key to a blissful night's sleep, but no more. Yesterday we even cut him down to a single painful hour (far too short for any sleep for his poor pregnant mommy), and he was up at midnight and 3 before getting up for good at 6.
In our cribby past, we have tried putting him to bed earlier, following the whole "sleep begets sleep" theory. Putting him to bed at 8 or 8:30 (instead of his accustomed 9 or 9:30) resulted in him getting up, for good, at 5 or 5:30 (instead of his accustomed 6 or 6:30).
In all our sleep deprivation and desperation, I have read I don't know how many books and listened to (and occasionally tried to implement) the advice of friends, relatives, or even strangers. When something works, it works for a couple of days and then we are back to night-waking. Something that continues to stick in my head, despite all the advice, are ringing voices of my mother and mother-in-law, who both attest that their sons (my brother and Dada, respectively) didn't sleep through the night until they were 2.
So I ask you...is this all just stupid? In all of our attempts to prolong Isaac's sleep, Am I trying to force an answer that will come about only when it is good and ready? As far as I can recall, the babies/toddlers I know that sleep through the night have either always done so all by themselves, or did so once their moms and dads turned off the baby monitors and quit interfering. Obviously ours has never done that. Should I keep up with our sleep experiments, which are quite frustrating in their inevitable defeat, or should I just try to relax and let Isaac sleep when he does and live with it when he doesn't?
posted by Claire at 6:26 PM
6 Comments:
Oh you POOR thing... :( I feel so bad for you! I have no advice because it really sounds like you've tried it all! :( Sounds like maybe you just have a nocturnal creature on your hands there!
Wow! Poor Claire! I barely lived through the 7 months that Jack didn't sleep through the night, I can't imagine what you are going through now, especially pregnant! I really don't have any advice. I am sure you have tried it, but have you tried to feed him a snack right before bed? Maybe he's hungry? Or maybe night terrors/nightmares? Maybe he is scared? Hang in there! At this rate, after the baby arrives, you and Isaac and UB are all going to be having middle of the night parties. Ugh!
Oh Dawn...you have read between the lines to see my BIGGEST FEAR!!!!! I am secretly hoping this magic "turning 2" will solve everything, because that will happen only a month after U.B. arrives. Please oh please oh please...
I'm so sorry Claire! you must be soooo pooped! I have no personal experience advice because I've been blessed (and I dont talk about it because it will change). Have you thought about putting him in the pack'n'play in your room and see if it keeps him quiet? Is that a disasterous idea? Seems like you have to spending lots of energy to get up and back and forth to his room. I take it the c.i.o./Ferber never worked or doesn't apply? The handful of times Liam has had issues we used that and in a day or two he was back on track. If Liam doesn't nap two hours during the day he doesn't sleep well at night. He is overtired and restless and wakes himself. I don't have anything else to offer but encouragement! and sympathy! And sleep dust to Isaac!
No advice here- just commiseration. Ryan has never really slept well either. We have good nights and bad nights. We feel lucky when the good outweigh the bad. He is beyond the magic two year mark and this week alone he has woken up 5/7 nights at least once. I'm hoping the one on the way is a good sleeper.
Does it make you feel better to know you are not alone?
Jen -- YES, yes it does. I had no idea Ryan was so bad...and you need your energy not only to cope with the baby-drain but also to run around after a six-year-old! Shall we send each other good-sleeper vibes for the babies that are soon to come?
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